TLDR

After 13 years at Apple, I decided to quit—not because I didn’t love the people or the work, but because my daughter barely knew who I was. During paternity leave, I finally bonded with her and realized I could never go back to 60-hour weeks that cost me my family. That wake-up call, combined with the reminder of how my old blog No More Harvard Debt helped thousands, pushed me to start The Drive Away Debt Plan (The DAD Plan)—a new mission to help dads and families break free from debt and financial stress.

When you’re free from money anxiety, you create space for better things: your health, your relationships, your purpose. That’s what I’m chasing—and what I want to help you chase too.

(Note: This summary was generated by AI to save you time. The full story below is written by me.)

____

I Quit Apple after 13 Years—Here’s Why

After thirteen years at Apple, I walked away from one of the best jobs in the world. Not because I hated it, but because my daughter didn’t know who I was.

Welcome to The Drive Away Debt Plan. (I’ll refer to it as the DAD Plan going forward because that just sounds better.) I am so incredibly grateful that you found your way here and are reading my humble words.

My name is Joe. I’ve been married to my beautiful wife, Mia, for five years, and we are the proud parents of 3-year-old Olivia and 9-month-old Dean. I bought this domain and started setting up this site just last Friday, but the ideas and the passion—some might call it an obsession—have been inside my head for over a decade. I was just too chicken and complacent to do anything about it until one particular event forced me to reevaluate my entire value system.

Over a Decade Ago

Back in 2011, I started up No More Harvard Debt (NMHD) where I blogged about my mission to pay off $90k of student debt in ten months and actually did it in seven. The blog miraculously got some incredibly strong press coverage, and I started receiving notes from complete strangers from all over the world thanking me for inspiring them to pay down their debt. The press coverage was cool and all, but the enduring feeling from that experience has always been one of overwhelming gratitude that I was able to have such a positive impact on my fellow human beings. It was very moving.

Paying down the $90k of debt allowed me to take a pay cut and go to Apple where everything but pay was better than my old company: leadership, culture, products, performance, and growth. Because I loved who I was working with, I got pretty good at my job and got a couple promotions. The pay cut quickly became a super moot point, and reinforced what I had hoped would be true when I initially set out to pay down my debt: paying off debt gives you the space to improve at least one thing in your life, be it health, career, marriage, hobbies, etc.

Until last year, I was happy at Apple. Good money, stable job, and absolutely incredible, collaborative, and wicked smart people. Long hours, yes, but tolerable—until they suddenly weren’t.

The Red Flag

Last year, Olivia and I couldn’t be left alone in the same room together without her crying. It got so bad that Mia asked me if I had “done something” to her. That question made me feel terrible, almost guilty. I thought about it for days afterward, and eventually got to the point where I could admit that it wasn’t what I had done to Olivia—it’s what I hadn’t done: No bedtimes or wake-ups, and no daycare pick-ups or drop-offs. Literally. Never. None. I was always too busy with work. So for five days a week, my daughter didn’t even know she had a daddy.

I can still remember the frustration and loneliness I felt from my daughter’s detachment from me and that painful question from Mia like it was yesterday—the room we were in, the lighting, time of day, and where we three were positioned. Sadly, it has become a core memory.

When I made this difficult admission to myself, something clicked—albeit softly—and I vowed to change—somewhat. I committed to participating in one bedtime and two daycare drop-offs per week. Olivia and I did get a bit closer—at least, she stopped automatically crying when we were alone.

Then we had our little boy and Apple gave me three months for paternity leave. Mia took care of Dean and I took care of Olivia. I did every single wake-up, bedtime, pick-up, and drop-off. In the evening and on weekends, we went to the park, explored, and rode scooters together. I took her to her gymnastics class. We became completely inseparable, to the point where Olivia requested me for bedtime when Mia started spreading her time between the two kids.

I’ve included some pictures we took during what were some of the most beautiful months of my life (and also the hardest, as any parents of a newborn can attest).

A Values Shift

In May, I went back to work full-time and quickly realized during my very first week that I could never work another 60-hour week again. It’s not that I no longer valued professional achievement, it’s just that I no longer valued it nearly as much as the tenuous bond I had formed with my daughter. I knew that this bond would quickly disintegrate if I didn’t take aggressive measures right away. Perhaps even more heartbreaking was the realization that I would never even get the chance to form such a bond with my son in the first place.

I immediately started looking around for a less demanding role, but nothing seemed interesting—literally every role seemed so bland and meaningless. I couldn’t get excited for any of it. Whereas I had once been able to get myself really pumped up about even the most mundane roles because they would pay $$, I could no longer feign enthusiasm for something I truly didn’t give a damn about. Coming to terms with this realization was actually really wild and unsettling for me because I didn’t see a way to foster the bond I had created with my daughter, build one with my son, and do work that I truly cared about all at the same time.

For some reason, I kept coming back to the emails I had saved from readers of NMHD so many years ago. I kept them all. Here’s one of my favorites:

Dear Joseph,
It’s such an honor to be writing this email to you. It means that as of today I am officially student debt free!
Inspired by your journey to tackle your student debt, I decided 10 months ago to follow suit and tackle my student debt.
I graduated from Emory University with BA in Psychology with $35k (including accumulated interest) of student loans in 2013 at the age of 23. With school tuition around $50K/year (including books, housing, etc.) I was looking at $200K for an undergraduate degree from Emory. Fortunately I only took out 17% of the total tuition in student loans. I had borrowed that amount even after Emory had fully funded my tuition for the first two years. Like you it was a mixed cocktail of loans: Federal Loans and Private (Discover Student Loans/Emory University Loan).
I was fortunate enough to leverage my analytical background and experience using statistical programming from research to land an IT consulting job out of school. While most of my friends went to Goizueta School of Business for their BBAs, I decided to steer in a different direction for my undergraduate career. Despite my insecurities and doubts for majoring in psychology (stemming from Forbes and Yahoo Finance articles naming psychology one of the leave valuable and worst majors to have in college aka little to no ROI), I ultimately realized that it was the best fit for me.
The journey has been transforming and life changing for me. From the moment I decided to manage my student debt (on my 24th birthday) I knew I was in for a ride. In an effort to maintain my budget every month I moved back home with my mother, stopped drinking for 7 months, and drastically changed my perspective on spending (no more shopping sprees or getting my nails done). Admittedly, it was tough for the first couple of months. While most of my friends went on extravagant vacations, bought new luxury cars, and luxury goods I maintained my budget and lived a simple life.
Relinquishing myself of the financial burden of student loans has been one of the best decisions I’ve made. Now I couldn’t be happier. I’m physically healthier (said goodbye to college drinking habits/packed lunches from home every day) and emotionally resilient (I can achieve anything I put my mind to). I am no longer governed by money or time or any artificial constraints that humanity imposes on itself. For that freedom, I am grateful.
Words cannot begin to express my gratitude. You inspired me to tackle the dreaded S-word and for that I am forever indebted to you. I can’t wait to see where this journey continues to take me and look forward to every minute of it. Cheers and happy debt free Friday!

What if, in the next chapter, I’m not just a person who sets a good example and inspires others, but actually provides one-on-one coaching? How much more of a contribution could I make? How many more lives could I change? After one of these reading sessions, I took a step back and considered the impact I was having on people in my role at Apple and the opportunity cost of the 60-hour work-weeks. I loved my team and colleagues at Apple, but I realized I could potentially help more people and spend more time with my family if I were to do personal finance coaching.

Why I’m Doing This

What I’m about to share is heavier, but it’s part of why this mission matters so much to me. While I was trying to determine if the world even needs yet another personal finance blogger/coach, I came across a stat that stopped me cold: Men are 16x more likely to have suicidal ideations if they’re under financial stress.

That is staggering. It’s difficult for me to admit this so publicly, especially since so few people who know me are aware, but I went to therapy during my adolescence because I had recurring thoughts of suicide. This stat hits particularly close to home because I know how badly things have to feel to think that suicide is a good option. (If you’ve been experiencing suicidal ideation, don’t face it alone. You can call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, or chat online at 988lifeline.org for free, 24/7 support.)

It bears repeating: when you are free from debt and financial stress, you create the space for better things—be it health, relationships, hobbies, career, helping others, travel, etc.

When I made the decision to walk away from Apple, I recognized that I didn’t have all the answers to this situation, but I knew I could help, so on 10/2, I gave my two weeks’ notice. In leaving Apple, I am simply practicing what I preach.

I Practice, Then I Preach

I’ve always believed you should practice before you preach. I can leave Apple, spend more time with my family, and explore a passion because I never stopped practicing the financial habits I developed during my NMHD days. I continued to live below my means and married someone who naturally does the same. By categorizing every single expense from the past 14 years in Excel each month— over 23k line items—I’ve been able to develop and track our budget. During that time, we’ve managed to pay off our house, cars, credit cards, completely fund our future retirement (CoastFIRE), and put a pretty good dent in our children’s 529 accounts. We also have a few years of living expenses saved up.

One more time, say it with me: when you are free from debt and financial stress, you create the space for better things—be it health, relationships, hobbies, career, helping others, travel, etc.

I want to coach you to do the same or better. I have so many ideas (articles, videos, tools, management systems) for helping dads and families get on solid financial footing, and I’ll be sharing them all here as well as on Instagram and YouTube.

If you’re a dad who wants more time, less stress, and a plan to get there, then you’re in the right place.

Thirteen years ago, I started No More Harvard Debt to dig myself out of a hole. Today, I’m starting The DAD Plan to help others do the same, and this time, we’re driving toward freedom together.